Bedroom Bully 101 | Girl Talk

Bedroom Bully  

(Noun) 

A MAN OR WOMAN THAT IS THE PRIMARY INITIATOR OF SEX IN THE BEDROOM. HE/SHE CONTROLS SEX AND THEREFORE CONTROLS THE BEDROOM.

Girl, have you ever felt insecure in bed?

It’s an often occurrence for women to feel insecure in bed and beat themselves up for things they definitely shouldn’t. Like I mentioned in my previous article, women shouldn’t have to feel “some sort of way” about their sexuality, but to instead embrace it…

So, your man has requested for you to ride him and take charge and for a moment, you question if you’re able to—skillfully—succumb to his demand to please him? Maybe you don’t know how to ride? Or you are afraid it won’t feel good for him? Are you uncomfortable because of your weight?

Granted, your fears stem from the notion that men love to have sex with the woman on top, and if I’m being quite honest, it’s one of the best sex positions for a woman to reach orgasm through penetration, but being on top requires technique, control, and stamina.

And so the questions begin to float around in your mind…Nailah, girl, how can I learn? How will I know if I’m are hitting all the right spots? How fast should I go? Up or down? Round and Round? Will he like it at this angle? Will it hurt him if I press my palms into his chest for balance?

Soon you’re no longer thinking about your own pleasure anymore because you’re too worried about him, and now the whole thing is stressful and tiring – you had no idea he had to work so hard!

But all that can change. By following these tips below, you’ll be getting your groove on better than Stella.

THE FIRST THING IN LEARNING HOW TO RIDE A GUY IS TO ADJUST YOUR ATTITUDE. IF YOU WANT TO “WOW” HIM WITH THIS POSITION, THEN YOU HAVE TO GET THE MENTALITY RIGHT.

Being on top is sexy because it wreaks of power – despite the fact that you will probably feel vulnerable, exposed and will be lacking confidence in your technique.

The whole point though is to be in control and enjoy yourself. If your guy sees you basking in the glory of riding his “Big Fella” all over the bed, then that alone is going to send him over the edge, you won’t even need a specific technique.

DON’T BE AFRAID TO LOOK HIM STRAIGHT IN THE EYE.

Establishing this kind of connection with the woman on top sex position can be incredibly stimulating, and it gives you the opportunity to communicate with him through facial expressions, dirty talk, or even just a simple smile that reminds you that it’s still just you and your man having great sex, with nothing to feel intimidated about.

MAKE SURE THAT YOU ARE BOTH TURNED TF ON. HIS DICK SHOULD BE STANDING AT ATTENTION AND YOU SHOULD BE WET.

Toss your guy over so that you can mount him. Once you’re straddling him with one leg on either side, you may want to tease him a bit before lowering yourself entirely onto his manhood.

You can hover, brushing against the tip of his rod with your clit if it feels good for you, you can kiss his lips, chest, nipples, even toot your butt up in the air, or slither down and give him a bit of a suck if he’s not as hard as you’d like.

Then slowly use your hand to guide his hard rod into your honey pot. Savor it. Move up and down until you have teased the head of his rod through the entrance of your vagina. Enjoy those sensations. Remember if you feel good, the chances are, so does he!

Once he’s in, you might want to move up and down along the length of his shaft slowly and purposefully, tilting your hips slightly when you push down so that they rotate and you can feel him rubbing all the right places inside of you.

DON’T RUSH INTO ANYTHING, KEEP THE PENETRATION STEADY, WHILE VARYING YOUR MOVEMENTS SO THAT HE DOESN’T GET TOO EXCITED TOO QUICKLY. YOU DON’T WANT HIM CUMMING TOO FAST. TRUST.

TIP: If you do the same thing for too long and he’s really enjoying the rhythm, he’s gonna blow, so tease and make it last. Most importantly, focus on building up your pleasure. It’s not that difficult to get a guy off once you get going, so focus on getting yourself off first boo.

TRY ROTATING YOUR HIPS IN CIRCLES TO SEE HOW IT FEELS.

Try light penetration so that the head of his penis slips in and out and you can feel that wonderful ridge of his on the lips of your vagina. Strive for long deep thrusts, using your PC muscles (also known as the pubococcygeus muscle, which is one of the pelvic floor muscles that supports the uterus and vagina….I’ll be writing about this soon) to grip/squeeze his dick inside your vagina. Try bouncing up and down – but not too hard – it might snap! (Girl, this legit can actually happen!)

DON’T FORGET TO GET HIM INVOLVED TOO.

He doesn’t have to just lie there while you do all the work, you’re going to get tired and quickly if you’re not used to being on top, so get him to help you.

He can lift you up and down with his hands underneath your butt, or he can pull you down onto his dick with his hands gripping your hips. He can rock you back and forth… You can take the pressure off your legs too by using his thighs or chest to lean on. Don’t worry about being “too heavy” and him losing his breath unless he says so.

  • Be careful not to get too carried away. If you stroke him in the opposite direction you could end up fracturing his penis! Just keep in mind that it’s not designed to handle all of your weight by itself.
  • Experiment by turning around so that he has a great view of your back and butt. Maybe even pull a “Trina” by spinning around and trying to still keep the dick inside, lol.
  • If you need a rest, you can focus on fondling his balls, kissing his chest, or slipping off his penis and going down on him.

FOR ADDED PLEASURE:

This is definitely the position to satisfy any man who loves to look at breasts, so make sure your breasts are looking their best! You can go for sexy lingerie, bras that give you a lot of sumptuous cleavage, bras that are made of sheer material so that he can see your erect/pierced nipples poking through.

TIP: If you are feeling self-conscious of your stomach because we don’t all have flat tummies, why not wear a sexy corset or a silky night-slip to cover up any flabby bits that distract you while you are writhing away on top?

Also, there’ll be a whole lot of manly washboard chest in front of you to play with, so why not paint your nails fire red to match your ruby woo lips and tap into his secret sex fantasies?

You can even kick it up a notch and leave on your f*ck-me heels! Be his sexy little dominatrix lover for the night. Listen, a man’s imagination is a powerful aphrodisiac. Take advantage of it!

FINAL SECRETS TO RIDING YOUR BEDROOM BULL:

Don’t forget to not overthink things. When you are too self-conscious and nervous during sex, a man can feel it, you can’t relax and you can’t enjoy yourself. The secret about riding him is being selfish. Basically, this is the time you use him for your own pleasure — and that’s precisely the part he’ll enjoy most: seeing how much pleasure you can get from him being rock hard inside you.

Smiling and moaning loud with your mouth slightly agape… are things that will turn him on and make him feel sexy (because he feels he’s the one making you feel this good). Another added pleasure is (if they’re clean and your kinky and trust him), take his fingers and suck them in and out of your mouth…

The key is that you seem as if you can’t even control yourself from the ecstatic pleasure you’re getting from being on top of him. And if you want to take it a step further, arch your back, hold onto his legs while you ride him fast (but do mix up the tempo occasionally).

50 shads of grey anyone? If spanking, bondage, gentle choking, butt plugs and handcuffs are your thing, go for it.

TALK TO HIS MIND!

Use the power of your voice to talk dirty to drive him wild with desire. The truth is that a man’s orgasm begins in his mind, not just between his legs. The more turned on you can get his psyche/imagination, the harder his manhood will be and the more pleasurable the experience. Then, girl, you can ride him into a stupor!

If you have other helpful tips on skillfully riding or if you plan on using some of these tips tonight with your honey, comment below! I love juicy deets!

Jasemine Knowles